when will the boob be safe...?

my grandfather passed away a few years ago from cancer, so i'm all for supporting cancer charities. like the other day i purchased a breast cancer doll (wearing a pink moo-moo mind you) and a pen for $16. i gave the little old ladies a $20 note and told them to keep the change as a donation. the way that they carried on was as if i actually handed them the cure to cancer instead of a $20 note - bless them.

i'm constantly amazed at the amount of breast cancer things that are out there...
  • water bottles with pink lids
  • pink deodorant cans
  • subway cookies with pink m&m's in them
  • pink tim tams
  • pink ribbon cake mixes - with pink icing
  • a pink ribbon mattress for your bed (yes, this is true)
  • pink pegs for your clothes line
  • pink pens, paper, sharpies
  • pink nike's
  • pink lip gloss
  • pink chocolate
  • pink body wash
  • pink gloves for washing the dishes
  • a pink hammer (saw this in bunnings)
  • pink gift cards
  • pink extension cords (lol)
  • pink bras
  • etc...
the list of the items with a tinge of pink in them and suddenly supporting breast cancer is HUGE... it's very apparent that you can buy almost anything and support this chartiy...

even this sentence is pink - because i'm supporting the cause!

so my question is, with all of these products out there in the world, the tens of thousands of them... SURELY they must have enough money to be pretty damn close to a cure?

i have done a lot of this cause and i think that i should be allowed to touch a boob or 2 (both lady boobs and man boobs)... why not? i can imagine it now... "hello new lady or man friend, see these bad boys? *touch boobs*, i'm supporting them in my own special way... it's ok, you can thank me later"

actually that's a little creepy. i wont be doing this. thank god for me role playing that idea...

never fear, i'll keep supporting the charity until a cure is found... because let's face it, cancer is an asshole and if he/she was my friend on facebook, i'd remove AND BLOCK them in an instant!

yeah cancer, you are no friend of mine... you stupid fuck!

aza
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